At one point, not many years ago, we had control over our own Windows computers. Microsoft has ripped that control from us gradually, and with Windows 11, not only does Microsoft decide which patches your computer needs, it also decides when to install them, and when to restart your computer to complete them.

Sure, there are ways to regain some control. Updates can be delayed, and restarts can be scheduled. But that’s only if you’re running the more expensive versions of Windows.

Various update-induced nightmares

Power settings reverted

I’ve never seen a satisfying explanation for why this keeps happening on computers I manage.

I suppose it’s possible that Microsoft is trying to be a good citizen, and tell the billions of Windows computers it effectively manages to go to sleep when they are no being actively used.

Sure, that saves power. And sure, most of the time a sleeping computer is just slightly annoying to its user. But the Windows sleep feature isn’t exactly reliable. Most power users leave it permanently disabled because it just causes too many problems.

It’s also a huge problem for computers that are mainly used remotely. When a remote Windows PC goes to sleep, it becomes impossible to access remotely. Someone has to go to the computer physically and hit the keyboard to wake it up.

Sure, there’s technology to get around this, such as Wake-On-LAN. But I have yet to see WOL work reliably on any Windows computer where I’ve tried it.

Incidentally, this exact scenario recently happened to me (again), and there was no way to access the remote PC until the business reopened two days after I needed remote access.

Default apps revert to Windows defaults

This has happened on Windows computers I manage more times than I can remember. There’s no pattern to it. I would almost prefer if this happened after every update, because then I would know that I always have to reset them.

It’s no coincidence, I’m sure, that the defaults involve setting up Microsoft apps to open everything. Nothing to do with the fact that a lot of those defaults involve opening files in Edge, and the fact that Edge is basically hated by everyone and used very little, at least intentionally.

Worse still, Microsoft has made it increasingly difficult to change these settings. The latest user interface is awful. And it’s now effectively impossible for an application to make itself the default for specific file types. Apps typically now have a message apologizing for not being able to make those changes, and telling the user that they have no choice but to use the crappy Windows interface.

Resetting all the default apps on my Windows 11 computer takes about an hour. I’ve spent a lot of time testing applications, and have settled on a collection that works very well for me. Very few of them are Microsoft apps. I have to keep notes about it, because I can’t remember all of the details.

Updates and reboots interrupt critical processes

You’ve probably heard the stories about people giving important presentations, only to be interrupted by updates and reboots. It’s even happened to Microsoft executives.

Microsoft has tried to improve this, offering to only install updates and reboot after hours, but those settings are far too limited.

Updates are not properly tested

Those other problems are annoying and problematic, but they pale in comparison with those times when Microsoft’s Windows update ineptitude has caused major outages around the world. There have been estimates about how much these problems have actually cost in terms of lost productivity, and the numbers are significant.

Of course, every time this happens, Microsoft says it was impossible to predict, and that it will never happen again. Here’s a suggestion, Microsoft: try testing updates properly before foisting them on millions of innocents users.

Conclusion

So hey, Microsoft. Kindly fuck all the way off with this bullshit. Linux looks better all the time.